When facing the prospect of fertility problems, no matter how mild they are forcast to be, google is not your friend...
Why? Why do I do this to myself? Not only am I researching Clomid and the possible steps just after that. I am researching how much IVF costs, the Medicare rebates, and obsessively stalking any internet mention of my OB/GYN. But I am reading, ad nauseum, blogs about infertility and pregnancy.
They're great, I've learnt alot about how people deal with infertility and the general popultions views of assisted reproductive technology (ART). But it's making my brain a little noisy. Too many different ideas and options floating around up there. And they refuse to shut up!
Also, my period's due. I can't get the tests that tell me just how screwey my ovaries are until four days or so after my period. So... pretty well the one time in my life I'm hoping for my period to hurry the hell up, and it's late! I'm too far into this trying game to have hopes that I'm pregnant, so really this whole thing is just driving me a little insane (read incredibly insane).
On that note, I'm out of here before my decent steepens.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Life changes
So many things have changed since my last post that I brely even recognise my life anymore...
Most of these changes have been for the better, my Husband left/was encouraged to leave his previous job. His soul sucking 100+ hours/week job that almost resulted in us splitting a few times, and kept us living in a town I despised.
He left because the carrot of promotion/being given his own store had been dangled one too many times with nothing to show for it. An offer was made to Hubby's boss to give my Husband a store and his boss turned it down for him with no input from my Husband. This resulted in a rather epicly proportioned blow up and there was a quit or be fired scenario that ended with Hubby quitting.
So, we've moved to a lovely NSW town, and we live snuggled away in the mountain wilderness. With acres between us and the neighbours. No more 40 degree months, no more soul sapping humidity, and definately no more Cane Toads!
Hubby has gotten a very stable but boring job, that requires the usual 35ish hours/week, and gives him a chance to rest a bit from the madness and ambition of his last role. However he's already antsy and has finangled himself into a trial for a much higher position.
Over the last 2 weeks he's been getting calls and emails from people above him. And every day or two the person has been getting progressively higher in the ranks. Until today, when he received a call from the International CEO! Good freaking lord! He's only been with this company a few months. I cannot fathom the guts that my man posesses, but I can say for sure that I wouldn't be positioning myself for a promotion anywhere near this early in a job. I suppose that's why he's the Domish one :p
Add to all this my decision to go to Uni, and not to work until I've gotten past the first few months, and boy do I feel inferior!
Now, on to the baby making! We've been trying, with varying levels of enthusiasm, to get pregnant for approximately 9 months now. If I'd managed to get pregnant when we first started trying I'd be damn close to giving birth by now. So, after discussions with my new GP, I was referred to an Ob/Gyn with experience in fertility issues.
The lovely Dr Glenn Taylor saw me this Wednesday, gave me my first ever Pap-Smear and internal exam, and had a chat with me about what he thought was happening.
Now, I know most women have had many papsmears by the time they reach 24. But I've always been terribly shy about showing my bits to people, even my Husband. So as you can imagine, some strange man that I'm already nervous about meeting for other reasons was not someone I was happy to have as my first.
However, it wasn't nearly as bad as I imagined it would be (yes mom, you were right AGAIN). And after I told him I was nervous he was very kind to me, he was gentle and just got it over with. Then we never spoke of it again. The perfect way to handle embarrassing situations in my opinion!
Dr Taylor had good news for me, and bad. The good news was that, as far as he could tell, I had never had a miscarriage. And that the doctor who told me I had was a bit of a rat. The less awesome news was that he thinks I have poor ovulation. So, just after my next period, I'm to go get masses of blood taken, and some really fun sounding internal ultrasounds. Then I'll go to see him and hopefully find out what's going on. His opinion is that if it is poor ovulation, then it will likely be easily fixed with some mdication/s, and we should be right to go for it again!
I have to say I'm a bit disappointed. I was really hoping that the Hubby would have to have one or two embarrassing fertility tests of his own. Unfortunately it doesn't look like it, and I'd honestly prefer it to be this easily fixed propblem rather than anything far more problematic (and expensive) like faulty sperm.
All in all, my life is completely different now, most probably for the better. But I still find myself missing the town I hated, and the life we had there. Despite the fact that I hated so very much of it. Is that strange?
Most of these changes have been for the better, my Husband left/was encouraged to leave his previous job. His soul sucking 100+ hours/week job that almost resulted in us splitting a few times, and kept us living in a town I despised.
He left because the carrot of promotion/being given his own store had been dangled one too many times with nothing to show for it. An offer was made to Hubby's boss to give my Husband a store and his boss turned it down for him with no input from my Husband. This resulted in a rather epicly proportioned blow up and there was a quit or be fired scenario that ended with Hubby quitting.
So, we've moved to a lovely NSW town, and we live snuggled away in the mountain wilderness. With acres between us and the neighbours. No more 40 degree months, no more soul sapping humidity, and definately no more Cane Toads!
Hubby has gotten a very stable but boring job, that requires the usual 35ish hours/week, and gives him a chance to rest a bit from the madness and ambition of his last role. However he's already antsy and has finangled himself into a trial for a much higher position.
Over the last 2 weeks he's been getting calls and emails from people above him. And every day or two the person has been getting progressively higher in the ranks. Until today, when he received a call from the International CEO! Good freaking lord! He's only been with this company a few months. I cannot fathom the guts that my man posesses, but I can say for sure that I wouldn't be positioning myself for a promotion anywhere near this early in a job. I suppose that's why he's the Domish one :p
Add to all this my decision to go to Uni, and not to work until I've gotten past the first few months, and boy do I feel inferior!
Now, on to the baby making! We've been trying, with varying levels of enthusiasm, to get pregnant for approximately 9 months now. If I'd managed to get pregnant when we first started trying I'd be damn close to giving birth by now. So, after discussions with my new GP, I was referred to an Ob/Gyn with experience in fertility issues.
The lovely Dr Glenn Taylor saw me this Wednesday, gave me my first ever Pap-Smear and internal exam, and had a chat with me about what he thought was happening.
Now, I know most women have had many papsmears by the time they reach 24. But I've always been terribly shy about showing my bits to people, even my Husband. So as you can imagine, some strange man that I'm already nervous about meeting for other reasons was not someone I was happy to have as my first.
However, it wasn't nearly as bad as I imagined it would be (yes mom, you were right AGAIN). And after I told him I was nervous he was very kind to me, he was gentle and just got it over with. Then we never spoke of it again. The perfect way to handle embarrassing situations in my opinion!
Dr Taylor had good news for me, and bad. The good news was that, as far as he could tell, I had never had a miscarriage. And that the doctor who told me I had was a bit of a rat. The less awesome news was that he thinks I have poor ovulation. So, just after my next period, I'm to go get masses of blood taken, and some really fun sounding internal ultrasounds. Then I'll go to see him and hopefully find out what's going on. His opinion is that if it is poor ovulation, then it will likely be easily fixed with some mdication/s, and we should be right to go for it again!
I have to say I'm a bit disappointed. I was really hoping that the Hubby would have to have one or two embarrassing fertility tests of his own. Unfortunately it doesn't look like it, and I'd honestly prefer it to be this easily fixed propblem rather than anything far more problematic (and expensive) like faulty sperm.
All in all, my life is completely different now, most probably for the better. But I still find myself missing the town I hated, and the life we had there. Despite the fact that I hated so very much of it. Is that strange?
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